REVIEW - "Grindhouse" (2007)

The first thing you must remember when walking in to “Grindhouse” is that yes, you are watching two full-length feature films. And yes, they are both b-movies. This is an odd movie to review because it is a double feature and a really unique throwback to the grindhouse concept. For those who don’t know, the "grindhouse" were small theaters stationed at large cities around the country showcasing double and even triple features that exploit violence, sexuality and everything else a soccer mom would detest. While the concept is brought to almost perfect light under Tarantino and Rodriguez, I wonder if they were trying TOO hard. Because we are dealing with two movies, I’ll review them separately.

PLANET TERROR

I actually enjoyed Robert Rodriguez’s film the most. “Planet Terror” is an apocalyptic zombie flick that decides to push the R rating further than it’s ever been. A small town led by a gun wielding bad-boy, Wray (Freddy Rodriguez), and his long time love interest, Cherry (Rose McGowan), combine forces to survive the onslaught of “infected” people. (Infected by what? Don’t know.) Cherry loses her leg to some zombies and ends up walking on a stick leg for a while. Later, when the entire town bands together to fight, Cherry is given a machine gun leg to do battle with the zombies (“sickos”) and post-Iraqi soldiers who are infected, but are able to maintain control of themselves.

To be honest, I’m a little confused as to how it all works, but does it really matter? It’s a b-movie, ass-kicking, zombie flick with a girl that has a machine gun leg. The answer is no. It doesn't matter. The movie litters itself with cheesy clichés, bad one-liners and even a “missing reel” just when a sex scene gets steamy. It’s quite a laugh and a fun ride.

The movie is actually very coherent and utilizes all the main characters to their fullest extent. It seems silly talking about character development in a movie as purposefully stupid as this, but it’s true. This film does a better job at bringing its characters full circle than most serious dramas do these days. Everything adds up to a rip-roaring finale of cheers and explosions before ending on an appropriately refreshing note.

As funny and entertaining as the movie can be, the violence made up more of the movie than I had hoped it would. For some gore maniacs this will be a treat. The stick leg going in to eyeballs, testicles being stepped on and tongues squirting blood will be great for them, but I was rather repulsed. Perhaps it wouldn’t have been as gratuitous to me if scenes of testicles falling apart and bubbling skin excreting goop were minimized. Did I mention a person puking up his own testicles?

I realize this type of extreme violence is part of the grindhouse concept, and looking at it that way it’s superb. But the intensity that “Planet Terror” was set on wasn’t my cup of tea. It’s a fun flick, and probably the better movie out of “Grindhouse”. But for me, it would’ve been more fun without the constant reminder of what bloody testicles look like.

*** out of ****


DEATH PROOF

I was actually looking forward to Tarantino’s film the most. But as it turns out, “Planet Terror” was where the real fun was. On the other hand, I was sick of the gore by now and “Death Proof” offered a lot less red goo than the previous film. (And testicles.) Furthermore, Kurt Russell gives one his most fantastically eerie performances ever as an ex- stuntman (Stuntman Mike) with a fetish for killing young women with his “death proof” car.

The movie has your standard Tarantino lines and moments of shear, edge of your seat thrills. The problem is, it doesn’t have much of a coherent story to play on. The characters are muddled and the movie feels more like two back-to-back episodes out of a television series than it does a movie. The first half of the movie introduces a set of girls who are quite unlikable and, without spoiling anything, end up serving no purpose to the finale of the film. The entire first half should’ve been cut down by 20 to 30 minutes and used as a strong intro. Instead we dance around these pointless, horrid female characters and I look at my watch wondering when Kurt Russell will get in his car.

The second act, however, is much more pleasing. It actually stands as a more coherent film on its own. The second cast of girls are far more likable and give the audience a much more entertaining movie. For example, two of the girls are also stunt actresses who decide to play a dangerous road game that Stuntman Mike takes advantage of. The scene is probably the best one out of the entire “Grindhouse” presentation. I was on the edge of my seat chewing my fingers the whole time.

“Death Proof” makes up a lot of ground in the second half and, again, gives a very entertaining finale. However, it starts out really slow and isn’t nearly as consistent as “Planet Terror”. But for those who would rather skip the gore, Tarantino’s grindhouse feature is for you.

**½ out of ****

The rest of the movie features faux trailers before each feature. While these trailers don’t get a great deal of credit, I want to applaud the efforts put in to them. They’re probably the most hysterical parts of the entire experience. Don’t miss the trailer for “Don’t!” and keep your eyes peeled for Nicholas Cage’s greatest cameo of his career. You’ll be laughing so hard you might have to puke your balls up…whoops!

So “Grindhouse” is a fun experience, but I can’t see it holding up for repeated viewings. I feel like it tried too hard to be “bad” in some places—It definitely didn’t have the same parody-esque feel of “Kill Bill”, nor the comic charm of “Sin City”. But, it was a worthwhile experience and I can see myself enjoying these films in the safety of my home one day—Just not back-to-back. I got to hand it to Tarantino and Rodriguez; they know how to make bad movies look good!

Overall:
*** out of ****