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Thursday, February 14, 2008

TRAILER - Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Right now I'm in a hurry and can't really explain how excited I am. But this is probably the most exciting trailer (or at the very least "teaser trailer") I've ever seen. Yes, perhaps it is just the excitment blinding my memory of other great trailers, but "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" is now currently tied with "The Dark Knight" for the movie I'm most excited to see this summer. Take a look! Take a look NOW!

One of my childhod heroes returns in full force!
Thank you Steven! I love you!

Many of Indy

A nice batch of Indiana Jones pictures have recently been released. Check them out. Sorry some of them are so small, but it's how they came:

"Wolverine" is Back!

The first photo from the solo Wolverine movie titled, "X-Men Origins: Wolverine," has been released and it's pretty badass! Jackman looks more "jacked" and pissed than ever in this upcoming X-Men spinoff. Can't wait to see what it's like.

May 2009.

"Star Trek" Pushed Back - May 2009

Well this is certainly painful news for me. The highly anticipated "Star Trek" film directed by mastermind J.J. Abrams has been pushed back to May 2009. The decision is due to a major reshuffle in the Dreamworks and Paramount release schedule. They claim the movie will gain more profit in the summer season, rather than the winter.

Though I'm really looking forward to this movie, I think this is a smart move and I'm not talking finacially. The extra time seems necessary for a movie this huge. Plus it the movie gives Abrams time to reshoot things he wanted to write in during the writer's strike, but was unable too.

In the long run I think this is a good move, and if I have to wait a little longer to see an even better J.J. Abrams' "Star Trek," so be it!

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

May the Lawsuits Begin

Just over the last few days two major lawsuits have sprung from the heap of nothing to cause problems. First up! Tolkien trouble!

The estate of J.R.R. Tolkien is now intending to sue New Line Cinema due to lack of profit. They claim that, even though the Lord of the Rings trilogy made nearly $6 billion altogether, they have not seen a penny of what New Line apparently owes them. They've tried to settle these desputes outside of court (which is why we have yet to hear of it until now) and will be filing a lawsuit against New Line.

According to the Tolkien Estate, New Line owes them a nice, rounded $150 million. (Basically the cost of one LOTR film.) Whether or not this affects the production of "The Hobbit" is yet to be determined.

Next up is 20th Century Fox and Warner Brothers. Warner Brothers has been adapting a film based on the graphic novel "Watchmen," a movie I've not covered much lately because WB found it best to throw out an amazing script by David Hayter. That's another story though. Fox is sueing WB, claiming that they hold rights to produce and distribute a movie based on "Watchman."

WB plans to release the movie in 2009, but Fox hopes to bring an end to the production and protect its own rights to make the film. It looks like WB won't be pushing forward with the project just yet.

Well that's peachy. The New Line thing is annoying because it seems they just don't like paying people: Peter Jackson, the Tolkien Estate. Though I'm skeptical of the Fox vs. WB saga. The "Watchman" movie has been announced and ready for awhile and Fox just now gets around to sueing them? How does WB overlook a thing like this? Why did it take Fox so long to come out and piss on WB's plans?

The "Clone Wars" Comes to Theaters

The computer animated Star Wars television series, "Star Wars: The Clone Wars," will be be making its debut in cinemas August 15. This unexpected move gets even more interesting. George Lucas has teamed with Warner Brothers to handle the movie's distribution, marking the first time Fox has not had a helping hand in marketing a theatrical Star Wars flick.

"Star Wars: The Clone Wars," is a television series said to take place in between Episodes II and III and will air on Cartoon Network and TNT. I assume the movie will be nothing more than the pilot episode.

Now the big question. The one I ask so often in the cinema world. Why? We know the obvious reason. But really, why? Cartoon Network already aired a "Clone Wars" mini-series on Cartoon Network that was hand drawn. Is this just the same story with prettier effects? Is this George's "SPECIAL EDITION" "Clone Wars," because it's become clear he likes doing the same thing over and over. I'm more interested in this live action television seeries he's planned that takes place between episodes III and IV, but who knows how that'll turn out. Looks like Star Wars has becoming the epitome of milking something for everything it's worth. I'm not intrigued.


Sunday, February 10, 2008

BRILLIANTLY DUMB JOCK Reviews "Strange Wilderness"

Seeing as I am writing on GMAN’s blog I do have to write reviews. For today I am going to do a review in the general format that I will use for my future reviews.

Strange Wilderness

Yes I know that GMAN already reviewed this but I feel the need to express my feelings about this movie seeing that I spent $7.75 on its. In a word, awful. In two, it blows. In three, god damn awful. In four…well you get the picture. I went to this movie thinking that I would like it because it has all the criteria that I normally like, young actors, bad jokes, drugs followed by dumb actions. But no, this movie sucked. This script was so bad that even a good acting crew couldn’t save it. In fact I am so repulsed that I don’t even have words to describe the horror that is Strange Wilderness. DON’T SEE IT!!!!!! I am really, really serious. Seeing as GMAN has reviewed it already I will let you read what he had to say and spare myself wasting anything more than I already have on that movie.

Movie Criteria:

How Good: Bad as my 14 year old brothers pick up lines.

Best Line(s): “Oh shit, a porcupine!”

Naked Breasts J:None dammit!!!

Drugs: Oh yeah.



Well it seems that somehow and for some reason someone actually decided to ask me a question. Shocking, I know. Believe me when I say that I am almost the last person that believed that would happen. To be honest I’m not completely sure whether this is a real question or if it just GMAN trying to keep me from feeling bad but I am going to answer it anyway.

“Which movie series is better, Spiderman or Starwars?” This is the question that was posed to me. To me the answer is quite obvious. I vote Starwars. Every since I watched A New Hope on a Halloween night a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away I have been completely awed by all that is Starwars. Yes, I know that the dialog is kinda crappy and the new movies leave a lot to be desired but the series as a whole is the single most dominating movie series of all time!! There is a clear and simple reason for this though, and that is the elements of Starwars. George Lucas wrote a timeless masterpiece that really sums up human existence. Inner and external power struggles, love, lost relatives, good guys, bad guys, aliens, really cool gadgets, and a lust for the future are what make up this amazing set of movies. Essentially, everyone can relate to these movies whether they were born in the 60’s or the 00’s. They are iconic.

Spiderman will never be able to attain the icon status that Starwars did. Starwars was so far ahead of its time that it still looks amazing. Yes, Spiderman has many of those elements that Starwars had but lets be honest, its really just not as fun and it doesn’t have Harrison Ford. So in answer to the question, I think that the Starwars series is the coolest, most fun, and greatest movie series of all time. Keep the questions coming, remember I can cover whatever topic. Bitch.


The Shark Never Got Him - Roy Scheider (1932-2008)

Roy Scheider, the man known best for playing Police Chief Martin Brody in "Jaws," passed away in Little Rock, Arkansas. His death was caused by a staphylococcus infection.

Scheider was nominated for two Academy Awards. He is succeeded by his two daughers, Maximillia and Molly, his son Christian, and his wife Brenda. Our prayers go out to his family. Farwell Scheider.