REVIEW - "Dragon Wars" (2007)

I walked in to “Dragon Wars” knowing exactly what I was getting in too. The fact remains that it had giant monsters and impressive looking special effects so I went to see it. It was as bad as I thought it would be, but much more entertaining than I expected. Non-the-less, “Dragon Wars” is nothing more than a Saturday night, Sci-Fi Original Motion Picture movie with a bigger budget and more action.

Our “hero” of the film, Ethan, discovers he’s the reincarnated version of a Korean warrior destined to protect a young girl with the power to turn a serpent in to a dragon. (He discovers this as a child, and his reincarnated master tells him this and proves it with a scar on his arm he got hundreds of years ago. This, of course, makes no sense because he’s reincarnated and doesn’t have the same body.) Ethan finds Sarah, the reincarnated girl that holds the dragon power, and protects her from the evil Buraki and his followers. Buraki is an evil serpent that wants the power for itself, but the power is meant for Imoogi, the good serpent chosen by the heavens to become a dragon.

Honestly, I liked the storyline. The fantastical elements to it would have made for a good movie. Instead, director Hyung-rae Shim tried to make this the most typical, Hollywood blockbuster he could. Here’s the results: Bad American actors plague this film with a fiery dose of horrid lines. There are comical scenes that want to be funny so badly, but instead the unintentionally funny scenes are what made me laugh. The human “drama” in this film was so painful to sit through that my head began hurting. “Dragon Wars” tried to be emotional, heart-felt, pulse pounding and suspenseful, but it fails in all aspects.

Shim has a weird idea of how America works or how people react in general. There are many little things in this film that are so laughable, I felt bad laughing after awhile. A few examples: Ethan’s master, Jack, floating in mid-air, meditating. Why? Sarah goes to the police station, after Jack rescued her from rapists, to tell the officers about Jack. Why? He saved her? Where did Buraki get all the human followers? How did the large, slow moving monsters get rocket launchers on their backs? How is it Ethan and Sarah can outrun Buraki on foot, but can barely outrun him in a car? When Buraki attacks Ethan and Sarah in the psychotherapist’s house why doesn’t the therapist run out with them? No one knows why a town is mysteriously destroyed at the beginning of the film—How in the world do you miss a 200 meter long, giant snake?

Absurdity aside, the special effects were mildly impressive and the fights were pretty fun. Shim’s last monster movie, “Yonggary,” offered some awful CGI and was only able to make it to the Sci-Fi Channel for American viewing. “Dragon Wars” is a huge step up for the Korean effects department. Unlike “Yonggary,” and most Sci-Fi Channel films, the battle scenes in this movie are plentiful and satisfying. When Sci-Fi Channel pits two monsters against each other, they normally only have the budget to keep them fighting for a minute and forty seconds. ”Dragon Wars” spends the better part of its second half showcasing explosions and monster action. The L.A. battle was fantastic. Dragons and choppers are slamming in to each other, monsters and tanks are exploding, buildings and debris are being tossed around in Buraki’s wake—It was a lot of fun. The following final battle between Buraki and Imoogi is a lot of fun as well. It’s everything Sci-Fi’s “Boa vs. Python” wanted to be and you could actually tell what was going on, unlike “Transformers.” Some of the sets are hokey looking, but overall, Korea’s special effects are closing in on ours.

Here’s my biggest problem with “Dragon Wars.” This is the second Korean monster movie released to American theaters this year. The first was “The Host,” a highly superior movie that was nearly perfect in every way. The problem is “The Host” got a limited release and was not as action heavy as “Dragon Wars.” Because “Dragon Wars” looks more mainstream, it got the wide release—So people are going to leave this movie believing this is how all of Korea’s films are like. It’s frustrating because this isn’t true. “The Host” was better than most of the Hollywood films that have premiered this year. “Dragon Wars” was horrible and Shim wants to cater to an international audience by making dreck. If he stuck to making films for his own country and the world saw more movies like “The Host,” perhaps his home would no longer be labeled as a joke to the foreign film industry.

* out of ****